Friday, March 17, 2017

Nexus, 6: Confronting Hurt with Honesty.

"Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in the way of a brother or sister" (Romans 14:13, NIV).

You were created for nexus, for connection. You need it. You long for it. It may look different than the way someone else looks for it, but everyone searches to belong in one form or another. Some find that connection with a tv screen or a movie, some in an office, on the golf-course, in the community, or at a bar. Others find it in a community of faith. One of the biggest roadblocks to nexus is when one person begins to misinterpret the actions or inactions of another. When one feels they are trying to connect and assumes another is not. Rather than engaging with honesty, they turn inward and judge.

Hurt is a powerful obstacle to overcome. Hurt doesn't need to be real or intended, but only perceived. Hurt will lead you to think in a direction that reality never traveled, but will allow you to "feel" it as real as though it did. You begin to make decisions based on that perception. You share the pain of your perception with others. You begin to withdrawl and remove yourself from being further subjected to such treatment. The break in nexus, or connection, that could have been confronted in healthy and open communication, has now become the stumbling block for you and for those from whom you seperated.

Relationships, friendships, and connections must be discipled. They go through a process. Don't stumble on your emotions nor allow your reactions to your emotions to become a stumbling block for others. Choose to be a part of the solution to every relational problem you encounter. Choosing to react to your emotions without calmly considering all sides is more destructive than it is in getting your point across. Be willing to discple others, to work with others, in helping them see who you are, how you feel, and how to continue in a way that honors each other, honors God, and honors the purpose in which HE crossed your paths. Be a discipler, not a destroyer. Stop misjudging and start joining together. Judgment blocks. Joining together breaks through.

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