"Then Saul hurled his spear at Jonathan, intending to kill him. So at last Jonathan realized that his father was really determined to kill David" (1 Samuel 20:33).
Jonathan couldn't believe that his father was capable of all that David had said. David had been the target of Saul's anger. It was an anger that had built up over time, was even a result of issues that had nothing to do with David. But now, Jonathan was the target. Jonathan, the one that Saul was fighting hard, even against God, to be the next king, now stood in the cross hairs of Saul's out of control emotions of a rage that was rooted in his own disobedience. How amazing it is, that we can get so angry against others, when it's really ourselves that is the object of such anger.
When people don't get their anger, jealousy, bitterness and resentment under control, eventually it is released or unleashed onto the people that are the closest and that mean the most to us. The very thing Saul wanted to protect, his son, was the one he tried to destroy in a fit of rage.
If it's there, deal with it. Plain and simple. It's a matter of "life and death." For me, I refuse to allow hurts and anger and the like to take control of my emotions. For too many years, I allowed it to build up, fuel my resentment, entrap me in bitterness, and justify my retaliation. I began to learn something that is still life-transforming to me today. If I don't control my emotions, then I am making it possible for my wife, kids, and anyone else I'm close to to be exposed to the explosiveness of my lack of self-control.
In all things, especially in dealing with the hurts, insecurities, and anger of our lives, we need to bring it to God, do what needs to be done in the natural, and leave the rest to Him. He's able to take that anger, replace it with a peace that goes beyond comprehension. You don't have to be angry. Anger is an emotion, but becoming angry is nothing someone can make you do. It's a choice. I choose to let it go and allow God to be God, to be my peace, and to take control of whatever situation in my life.